Tuesday, December 13, 2016

12 Days of OSR Christmas


Today is the first day of The 12 Days of OSR Christmas. Simply leave a comment below (on this post only!) and I'll select one commenter each day to win a single random prize. Only one commenter per person, please.

But, there's a catch: You have to tell me why squirrels are awesome. If your comment doesn't include that, you're disqualified.

All prizes will be shipped via media mail and I ask that those who enter be residents of the U.S. 48, simply because I can't afford the insane international shipping rates.

This year I'm offering up the following prizes:
1st Day: Saddle-stitch copy of Blueholme Prentice Roleplaying Game (WINNER: +Frank Turfler!)
2nd Day: Hardcover copy of Swords & Wizardry White Box (WINNER: +Christopher Bishop) 
3rd Day: Softcover copy of Swords & Wizardry White Box (WINNER: +Jeff Scifert)
4th Day: Softcover Tunnels & Trolls Deluxe, 7th ed (WINNER: +Jim Cox)
5th Day: DC Universe RPG Roleplaying Box Set (D6 System) (WINNER: +Ragnar Hill)
6th Day: Smallville Roleplaying Game Hardcover (WINNER: +Edward Fadigan)
7th Day: Coil-Bound Astonishing Swordsmen and Sorcerers of Hyperborea Player's Manual (1st ed) (WINNER: +Dak Ultimak)
8th Day: Coil-Bound Astonishing Swordsmen and Sorcerers of Hyperborea Player's Manual (1st ed) (WINNER: +Vincent Florio)
9th Day: Hardcover copy of The Hero's Journey Fantasy Roleplaying (WINNER: +Jason Vines)
10th Day: Hardcover copy of White Star: White Box Science Fiction Roleplaying (WINNER: +Dale Houston)
11th Day: Hardcover copy of White Box Omnibus (WINNER: +William Dowie)
12th Day: Labyrinth Lord Revised Hardcover & Labyrinth Lord AEC Hardcover (my personal copies with unique Tolkien-themed covers) ( +R.J. Thompson)

170 comments:

  1. Merry OSR Christmas! And I consider squirrels to be the epitome of evolutionary Darwinsim. After all, how can these things not be extinct when they are always the subject of every distraction . . . SQUIRREL! Consider me commented :)

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  2. Squirrels are awesome because they're always so full of energy! Geebus Crimminy but they're always zipping around at top speed. They even clean themselves in rapid fashion!

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  3. Did you know squirrels can small food under a foot of snow? I didn't.
    http://www.nwf.org/kids/ranger-rick/got-squirrels.aspx

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  4. Squirrels are awesome because they are wicked fast.

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  5. Squirrels are awesome little problem solvers. You can throw all manner of squirrel-proof bird feeders at them, and they will, without a doubt, find a way to get at that delicious bird seed.

    We have one of these clever little creatures, who my wife and I refer to as "fat squirrel". He's definitely had his fill of ill-gotten goods. And he loooooooves to hang out on our patio and torment our cats.

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  6. In July of 2007, Iran arrested 14 squirrels on charges of espionage.

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    1. Can you link me to a source for that article? That sounds FANTASTIC.

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    2. Sure thing. Several news orgs ran the wire story. Here's NPR: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=12131243

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  7. Marry OSR xmas! Squirrels are awesome because they have mastered the art of the food-fight, driving off large predators with their meals!

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  8. Merry Christm-OSR! Squirrels are oft unappreciated sentinels of the tree of life.

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  9. If a squirrel were man-sized it would be able to tear open a smart car with its bare paws and crack a bowling ball in half with a single bite.

    Lesson to be learned - it's not safe leaving your bowling balls in a smart car, not when there are man-sized squirrels about.

    I feel like Man-At-Arms doing the safety spiel at the end of a He-Man cartoon.

    Merry OSRMass!

    Stay in school kids. And slay Orco if you see him, he's worth 150XP!

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  10. Squirrels are awesome because they control the weather and traffic lights.

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  11. I am in. I used to have a pet squirrel when I was a kid. Named it Kevin. Later learned it was a female squirrel. Kept the name.

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  12. Squirrels keep my back deck clean.

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  13. Squirrels are awesome because the one in my backyard sits in the tree and throws pecans at my dog.

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  14. Sic Squirrel: When cast, summons a rabid squirrel that bites your foe in the balls. Foe is paralyzed for a round from pain and embarrassment (especially if foe is female, finding out that she all of the sudden has balls), then dies of rabies over the next week. Squirrel automatically hits and your foe gets no save, because squirrels are badasses.

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  15. Cool, so much good stuff. White Box, Hero's Journey, White Star. The possibilities are endless. So the squirrels around my work have apparently grown to like me. At least they don't run away from me anymore. Is that liking? I'm counting it as liking!

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  16. They are awesome because they keep my wife on her toes. She'll be out on the weekends every 15 minutes during certain hours of the day yelling and clapping at them from the deck to get them off the bird feeders.

    We have one out back who we've dubbed Spastic Ninja - he only moves with wild arcing leaps, never in the same direction he seems to be looking. Imagine a guy going down an office hallway leaping and rolling the whole time just to get to the copier - that's this squirrel.

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  17. Squirrels are awesome because just the sight of one in the road will put you on edge and force you to make a decision about slowing down or saying hey squirrel you better move your ass. Either way at the last moment they will change direction and you have to make the same decision in a split second. Either choice you think you may have it it.

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  18. Squirrels taunt my cat through the glass door.

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  19. Squirrels are awesome because no one expects the human-sized rats-with-fluffy-tails to be lycanthropes...

    Until it's too late!

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  20. Squirrels are awesome in general but the squirrel that lIves next to me is SUPER awesome as he has no tails so he looks like a small gray bear.

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  21. Excellent contest there, OSR Santa.
    For the awesomeness of squirrels you need look no further than Squirrel Girl and her sidekick Monkey Joe from the Marvel Universe. That's about as awesome as it gets.

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  22. Just couldn't go through with the lie…squirrels are the scourge of the Oerth!

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  23. Squirrels are awesome because there are so many varieties. In Michigan, they have black and gray squirrels, just that I have seen. There may be more varieties, if I researched.
    One office we were located had a wildlife area behind it where the black and grey squirrels would scuffle over nuts. They only have grey ones where I live.
    I found an article that said most black squirrels are just a variation on gray squirrels. To me the black ones have a different shaped head and a different quality to their hair, in the way it lays.


    There is a small town near Springfield, MO that has a population of white squirrels. http://www.ruralmissouri.org/03pages/03DecSquirrels.html

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  24. Squirrels are awesome. They are a great protien source that's low in fat. Baked, roasted or even deep fried. You can't go wrong with that sweet sweet squirrel meat!

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  25. Squirrels are awesome because they entertain my dog. My dog can sit for hours panting and pawing at the window.

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  27. I love the Holidays! I remember hunting with my dad when I was young. Twice he got so mad of the squirrels making noise he fired arrows at them. I never saw him so annoyed.

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  28. Squirrels are awesome because they are the mascot of my favorite local gaming con, Running GAGG.

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  29. Roses are red
    Squirrels are awesome
    They run up in trees
    And are glad they don't smell like possum

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  30. Squirrels are amazing, especially the white ones which are agents of the gods. And when you give them light sabers, they are more awesome.

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  31. Aside from being difficult to spell (which helps protect them from having their names used in witches' spells), swkirrels are awesome in their genetic diversity. Not pertaining to their awesomeness, but there used to be a squrl nest just outside our third floor window--the little babies were up against the glass and we got to watch them develop. Weird!

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  32. We do not have squirrels in Brazil, so I can't tell why they are awesome... We have little monkeys though! And they are way more awesome! Simple because they are little MONKEYS!!!

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  33. I have an entire race of squirrel-folk in my D&D world. They are tied (loosely) to Yggdrasil, the world tree...and THEY ARE AWESOME!

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  35. In a distant aeon, squirrels are one of the transplanted Earth species of animals living on Pluto.

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  36. Squirrels are pretty much the perfectly awesome animal. In fact, without proper concern they may replace humanity soon as the top mover-and-shaker on Earth! I recommend everyone join the Squirrel Defense League today! I just ran the numbers in D&D and a group of six squirrels can strip the average NPC of flesh in just two minutes!

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  37. Squirrels. My dog loves squirrels. Seriously loves them. I don't see the thrill. I mean their okay. I like to watch them every once in awhile. But, my dog...LOVES them. I wish I knew what made them so interesting, its like I am missing out on a party.

    So, yeah, squirrels to my dog is like soccer is to Americans.

    Have a wonderful OSR season!

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  38. A squirrel once used a fellow hiker's head as a launch pad when jumping from tree to tree. Utterly hilarious and quite awesome!

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  39. Squirrels are nature's silent assassins.

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  40. Squirrels are awesome because they scare my wife like crazy!

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  41. Awesome squirrel story. I just recently saw a news story on the local news about a squirrel who was taking Christmas lights from a house's outdoor Christmas display. The squirrel was chewing through the electric wires and taking the lights and burying them. As of the news story it has buried over a 100 bulbs. I got a pretty good laugh out of that. So Happy 12 Days of OSR Christmas!

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  42. Squirrels bypass every security measure man places around birdfeeders with confidence and aplomb. If you watch them in slo-mo videos you can see them do a little wave and mouth "ciao baby" as they steal the seeds. It's amazing.

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  43. Squirrels purchase all your products, which makes them smart and well-informed. Keep up the great work.

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  44. Merry Christmas, James!

    As a young swamp rat in Florida, I'd sometimes watch the squirrels of my neighborhood mate in the trees above my mother's house. Did you know that squirrels do it doggy style? It was as hysterical as it was awesome to watch.

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  46. Merry Christmas to the ole' Halfling! Squirrels are often time mistaken for being animals. Secretly they are actually aliens sent to observe us. In fact I once saw a squirrel smoking a cigarette in St. Louis. I am pretty sure one day we will see they have had enough of us, they will get on their spaceships they have packed with nuts and fly off for safer worlds.

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  47. Squirrels are acrobatic and surprisingly persistent when they want your food. Also they adaptable, you find them all over the place.

    Also, would like to be entered in the contest, please.

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  48. Sqirrels watch over us. That's why you see them all over the place. They are there to help us in our darkest hour.

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  49. Squirrels are scarier than bears or sharks. If you flee from a squirrel up an elevator to your fortified penthouse apartment the little furry bastard will climb the walls and track you down. Bears and sharks will just be stranded at the bottom. They're the Jason of the animal kingdom.

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  50. ...because I just found out the squirrels I trained for years to be spies were arrested back in 2007 for espionage in Iran? I left them in Norway...

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  51. Squirrels are awesome because this one time when I went camping they managed to break into all the food we had brought with us. We thought we had secured it well, but that turned out not to be the case. We woke up in the morning and there were 3 fat squirrels barely able to move from the area where the food was stored. Fat bastards didn't even care. There were 4 of us and we had bought enough food for 3 days of camping.

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  52. Squirrels are awesome because they hang out and play with my cats in the picture window AND play chase with our dogs. That's pretty awesome.

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  53. squirrels are the perfect D&D creature ... part rabbit (the speed and stop-on-a-dime turning), part bat (the 'flying' or jumping part), and part rat (all the rodent parts, save the furry tails). It's as if nature did a Gygax ... think Owlbear with less damage ....

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  54. Squirrels are agents of the apocalypse

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  55. Squirrels are awesome because they remind me of my wife. When I first met her, her friends had decided that squirrels were her spirit animal. They even gave her a little heraldic squirrel. I have associated them with her ever since. Merry Christmas!

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  56. Squirrels are awesome because they are curious and industrious creatures with a bit of a mischievous streak. For example, at my apartment we have a squirrel that my wife and I call Bob. Bob likes to run around on our deck and gather supplies and food. He is always diligently gathering food. Despite this hectic schedule, he always takes time to stop by the sliding glass door and taunt our cat, Gypsy. I cannot tell you the number of times Gypsy has lunged headlong into that glass door.

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  57. Miss Suzy was one of my favorite books as a child!
    She was a gray squirrel who lived in a doll house and played mother to a bunch of toy soldiers who defended ger from thieving red squirrels.

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  58. Squirrels are like the Mini-Me of animals! They rock and will have no issue killing you the minute you turn your back or stop feeding them lol

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  59. Squirrels are awesome: but may contain nuts

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  60. Howdy! Please enter me! Honest to gosh, I've always said that if I was ever to be bitten by a radioactive animal and gained its powers, I'd want it to be a squirrel! Squirrels are awesome! Then I could leap amazing distances, I could crawl up and down trees, and I'd be wicked fast. In one of my jobs, I had a window that looked out over an tree that seemed to be a squirrel condo. Little gray tufts of squirrel running up and down it continually. Most impressive was when they would leap off the deck and land on a tree upside down. Yeah, squirrels are the bomb.

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  61. For a few years, I owned the domain name squirrelseatbears.com, and I'm still the moderator of a subreddit of the same name. So, squirrels are awesome because they eat bears, obviously!

    Also, thank you for running this. It's extremely generous!

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  62. Squirrels are awesome because they have a Buddha-nature.

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  63. In college squirrels would write letters to a friend of mine and taunt him with what they were hiding from him while he was away. It was awesome watching him squirm.

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  64. Squirrels are awesome because they gave that squirrel in "Over the Hedge" caffeine and it was hilarious!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z-eMdMsMgCU

    Also, I've had squirrels in my attic, and having bats in one's belfry doesn't even begin to compare!

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  65. Squirrels are awesome cause they see shit the rest of us ignore, and if you treat them right they will tell you tales.

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  66. Squirrels only carry only d20s with 20s on all sides. When questioned regarding this they will always produce a regular 20 that looks exactly the same as the 20 in question. They will then shake their head, and say in a fairly loud authoritarian voice "please roll Initiave". (if I by chance win, please roll a 20 and a 8 +3 to pick a us resident... The squirrel suggested it. I gotta go he wants cheezies and mountain dew. Sw

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  67. Squirrels are awesome because "In Soviet Russia, squirrel hunts YOU!"

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4489792.stm

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  68. Squirrels can run along electric lines? Ever see a human pull off that stunt. Not pretty...not pretty at all.

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  69. My cats decapitate them and it's weird that my cats would just eat the heads.

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  70. Squirrels are awesome because they dig up half of the flower bulbs my wife plants, gnaw on them once, and then just leave them nearby. Her frenzied reactions, cursing and trying to ward them off with homebrewed pepper sprays and powders entertains me in spite of the aggravation they cause.

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  71. I simply cannot tell you why the squirrels are awesome because I am ambivalent about eradicating those that run in front of the wheels of my large destructive machines. After all, they eat phone lines and could prevent me from reaching BBSes in the early 90s. If this disqualifies me, I shall accept it with ratatoskrian ferocity.

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  72. Squirrels are awesome because Germans can't pronounce "squirrel". (Or at least have a very hard time trying) Seriously Google "Germans trying to pronounce squirrel"

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  73. Please. Squirrels are nervous psychopaths that make the weirdest screeching noise when they are pissed at you. Like being being bitched at by fuzzy blue jays. They can hang upside down while climbing. They can go from said crazy mode and then look all adorable nibbling a piece of stolen bird food. Awesome.

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  74. Squirrels are awesome because at my old apartment they would climb up the side of my building right past my 11th story window.

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  75. I once caught my squirrels all laying in the lawns belly up sunning themselves. I thought they were dead but they vanished when I glanced away. I guess they didn't like a peeping tom...

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  76. Squirrels happen to be a Super-Villain's ideal starting material for a legion. Almost as abundant as rats, squirrels are far more agile and have greater grip strength, as well as increased levels of seething rage and hatred for human society which they consider to have usurped their rightful place on Earth. They make excellent minions, from assassins to lab assistants, whether aided by bionic modifications or genetic manipulation and mutation.

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  77. 1. They are awesome because they were transported into cities so that urban residents could interact with wildlife -- yet they flourished, even after an otherwise unnatural introduction.

    2. They are awesome because they attract fervent following: The daughter of a comic artist friend created an online survey about how great squirrels were and got over 2,000 responses.
    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfaN_Q58WDlEcGXXXetEfLJTULwlPW8NWRD2bj7wUxhMI8umw/viewform

    3-4.They are awesome enough for me to have seen stylish squirrel racing decals, as well as a rare but metal AF black squirrel (in Detroit).

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  78. Did you know what in the early 80's squirrels caused hundreds of power outages each year in Lincoln Nebraska alone, and the damages caused by squirrels chewing power cables resulted in about $27,000 annually.

    In 1985, Squirrel cages were installed on powerlines, which cut the damages by about 3/4.

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  79. Squirrels are awesome... but they stare at me... through the window... every day... just ... staring.

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  80. Squirrels are awesome because they run all over the neighborhood like bosses and they play chicken with cars and they dig holes like nobody else can and their tails are awesome because they're big and bushy and black squirrels look like ninjas!

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  81. Squirrels are awesome because if you give them swords and armor they'll fight for glory .... :)

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  82. One day, a long time ago, I was sitting on my back porch having a smoke when I heard some something and saw some movement up in the branches of the large tree that was in my backyard. At first I wasn't able to see very clearly what was happening, and then I noticed a snake fly out of the tree, over the nearby fence and into my neighbor's pool. Looking back up, I saw a squirrel hopping away from where it came from.

    A couple days later, I was less than politely asked if I had thrown the snake into my neighbor's pool (My neighbor and I didn't care much for one another, but it wasn't to the point where I was going to vault carcasses at them). I came to find out it's head was ripped off before the squirrel threw the body out it's tree.

    I like to think that somewhere in that tree, if it still stands, there is a cozy living room with a recliner, swank nut bar and little fireplace with the snake's head mounted over it.

    If that doesn't cement the awesomeness of squirrels, I don't know what would. Rock on little tree rodents.

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  83. Hands down, squirrels are the most deadly wilderness encounter you can come by. I once ended my campaign with a squirrel attack. I would love OSR product- I feel I have embraced my Old school roots and use many of the OSR rules and retro clones having been a FLAILSNAILS conventioner and Labrynth Lord for a few years now.

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  84. Are you mocking the Squirrel gods? The Squirrel gods are not amused lowly human! You will be gathered into their cheek-bags of holding and carried with all haste to a place of hiding where your soul will be harvested at a later date (when the Squirrel Gods are more hungry). The lesser servitors of the Squirrel Gods, the humble woodland squirrels, are Awesome in their worship as they are the spreaders of seed and planters of the great trees you worthless human! Bow before your incisored betters!

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  85. Squirrels are awesome bc my cat makes insane noises at them in the morning

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  86. Squirrels are awesomely evil. Like some terrible, furry parasite they invade, infest, and colonize living trees. Then, they subsist by kidnapping, burying, and then later EATING the poor tree's babies! They're evil, furry, parasitic, baby-eating monsters!!

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  88. Squirrels are amazing and can get into anywhere. Darn things will even eat the fascia boards of houses to break in and get to food! True story :) All I could think of was how much their next bowel movement had to hurt . . . and not feeling a bit sorry for them!

    Happy OSR Christmas!

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  89. Squirrels are awesome because they help squirrel girl, who is awesome cause she is part squirrel. It may seem circular but it isn't.

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  90. Squirrels are the mounts and servants of the tiny fey. The are specifically used to misdirect the attention of us human folk so that we do not notice the various missions the tiny fey undergo in broad daylight right under our noses. Sometimes, they even are used to train humans to do the tiny fey's bidding!

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  91. The cleverness is in seeing the plethora of people of all ages still into OSR gaming. Long live the OSR!

    bät

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  92. No one has yet thought to mention the inimitable Secret Squirrel and his sidekick Morocco Mole. So awesome that, in the 90's, he was revived as a character on 2 Stupid Dogs.

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  93. As we all know, squirrels are the servitors of the great old ones. That is why they are everywhere, constantly watching our movements, using their psionic powers to influence our actions and prepare our minds for the coming of the Great Old Ones, when the stars are right...

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  94. Let me tell you something about squirrels. The university I went to had a freakishly high population of these bushy tailed rodents. You couldn't turn your head without seeing whole scurries of squirrels foraging around each tree and shrub and garbage can on campus.
    Theories spread as to their origin. An eccentric German professor brought them over to remind him of home (are there great squirrel armies in Germany?). The campus bought them to combat a particular fungi vegetation that had been taking over (likely after it had been planted to poison an invasive insect swarm). The science department used to conduct experiments on them, until some eco-terrorists broke in and freed them all, setting them loose on campus.
    So what's awesome about squirrels is that they easily inspire the imagination to concoct ridiculous stories in order to win favor.

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  95. Squircles are awesome because they combine the rigid rectilinearity of a square with the gentle ellipticity of a circle. Often confused for their more straightforward cousins, rounded squares, squircles can be distinguished by the barely-perceptible convexity of their sides. After Retina displays freed designers from the tyranny of the pixel grid, Jony Ive chose the quirky superellipses whose n=4 and whose a=b=1 as the base shape for app icons in the iOS 7 redesign, and we've loved them ever since.

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  96. Count me in. I've often dreamed of squirrels large enough to ride, which I think is pretty awesome

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  97. Merry OSR Xmas to all !! As a resident of NYC squirrels hold a special place in my heart. I like to think of them as my personal escorts and protectors on my way to and from the Subways!! My personal Squirrel Knight guardsmen !! Much love to my squirrel protectors !!

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  98. Squirrels are awesome microbrewing little drunkards: over the years of my aquaintence with those in my parents back yard they've taken to dropping food purposefully into an unused bird feeder and then /wait/ long days until the unholy mix of rotten food, water, sunlight and luck ferments into a brew . . . . a brew they then drink and that leaves them staggering about the yard in drunken circles and tumbling butt first off trees.

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  99. Growing up near Kent, Ohio, it was always something special when we saw one of the famous Kent black squirrels. They were unlike any other squirrel we'd ever seen. Awesome? Maybe. Genetics? Definitely.

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  101. Hey, keep this on the dl, but squirrels are actually just very small humans.

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  103. Squirrels are smart. We have one in the house right now, and it's in my girls' room, because that's where all the fun toys are... :)

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  104. I'm not sure about awesome, but we had an urban squirrel in our backyard nicknamed "Tiny" who I swear had a double chin and bingo-wings.

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  105. Squirrels are awesome, because they can consistently defeat my attempts to memorize the spelling of their name.

    I suspect *Mind Cloud*

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  106. Squirrels are awesome because they like to sneak up behind old people sitting on benches and burrow into their skulls. They're doing their part to create a progressive future.

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  107. Squirrels are the secret enemies of cats. Cats allow themselves a level of domestication to protect themselves from the squirrels' evil schemes.

    The squirrels consider humans a mild nuisance.
    They also believe that humans are subjugated by an evil race of automobiles. Apparently automobiles swallow an unwitting human or humans to establish a symbiotic relationship. In other words, bonding with a human is the only way evil automobiles can move and eat.

    The cats have done nothing to disabuse squirrels of their far-fetched notions.

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    1. Squirrels are awesome because they plant trees. Not a second entry, just realized that I never answered the question. D'oh!

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  108. Squirrels are awesome because they are the source of power for the best of all contemporary super-heroines, Squirrel Girl! As I understand it, she is not in fact part squirrel (any more than Spider-Man is part spider), but channels squirrel awesomeness in the name of justice.

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  109. Squirrels are awesome because of their big, bushy tails!

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  110. Why are squirrels awesome? Simple, they are delicious.

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  111. "Well Well Well" - King Richard, Galavant. Squirrels, are not awesome in any shape but only the black ones are cool. Yes we have black squirrels down here.

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  112. Squirrels are awesome because they are soooooo delicious! I call them the Filet Mignon of the forest.

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  113. Damn. Someone already mentioned Squirrel Girl.

    Well a second reason squirrels are awesome is that they can be both terrifying and funny at the same time. My grandfather was once attacked in the middle of the sidewalk by what we can only assume was a rabid squirrel. After the squirrel's initial attack, he grabbed a broom and faced off with it in what was ultimately a duel to the death. My grandfather won, protecting us all from a furry doom (or at least a series of nasty rabies vaccine shots), but only after being forced into a number of ridiculous gyrations by the little beast.

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  114. Squirrels are awesome because they horde nuts... Nuts.. of all things.. They are like there one ring......

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  115. When I was at the zoo I saw a large cat exhibit that was completely empty, except for two squirrels. They took out an entire pack of 4 HD lions. True story!

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  116. Squirrels are amazing because of their innate mastery of Motorola 68000 assembly language.

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  117. Squirrels are awesome because they even fight cats.

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  118. The squirrels in my back yard are amusing to watch. Up one tree, hop to the opposite tree and back down to the ground. Then a mad dash back to the first tree to start the loop again. They sure get their exercise in.

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  119. Squirrels: our arboreal allies, or bushy-tailed tree rats?

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  120. Squirrels are awesome because they can run vertically up a tree at 12 mph.

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  121. Because 15 of them can take down an Eldrazi! (Very sorry...that was an MTG joke...)

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  122. Squirrels are excellent creatures because they are.....wait for it....completely nuts!!

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  123. I don't know if this has been mentioned; but squirrels are awesome because their feet can rotate 180 degrees backwards. Oh, and that high percentage theif ability where they hide behind the tree, but you know they're there, but you can't run to the other side of the tree and find them cause they're already on the side you just came from!

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  124. Squirrels are rats with a better tailor.
    Im just getting back to OSR

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  125. Happy Non-Denominational Wintertime Celebratory Event! ;)

    Why are squirrels awesome? They run with a crew that can best Dr. Doom, Thanos, and other elite marvel threats.

    Also? Their front teeth never stop growing. That's some serious orondental chops, right there.

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  126. Happy Winter Solstice, or something!!!

    Squirrels are awesome, period. They'd be even more awesome if they were armored and packing machineguns. Can you imagine a flying squirrel equipped this way?

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  127. Squirrels are awesome, cause they have the best thieves guilds and after the heist they bury their loot around their favourite taverns, with incomparable nut brandy. You don't want to know what they do to those that they catch trying to steal their stuff.....

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  128. To me, squirrels are awesome by providing for my dogs physical and mental health. Under normal circumstances, Geno (the dog) would be just as fat, lazy, and lethargic as his master. The squirrels, however, provide him with a sense of purpose by giving him a trade to practice (ie making sure the squirrels don't remove all the seeds, nuts, and acorns from our property). This occupation gives him a sense of self worth, with the added benefit that, in practicing said occupation, he maintains a healthy body weight.

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  129. Squirrels are awesome because they can eat pretty much anything. I've seen them eat ant traps, plastic toys, and dead birds, not to mention the usual acorns and whatnot.

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  130. Squirrels - well, Rocky was cool, right???

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  131. Squirrels are awesome because they clean up the birdseed the darn birds spill from our big bird feeder. Though they do tend to flee when the wild turkeys come through wanting the same spilled birdseeds.

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  132. Squirrels are awesome because they are smart and adaptable.

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  133. Squirrels are awesome because they're cute and they count Chip & Dale in their numbers :P

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  134. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jjsghAFG2GQ

    is how squirrels can be awesome

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  135. Squirrels are awesome they are in cahoots with fairies that probably want to kidnap your childen, or possibly make you a pair of shoes, depending on the quality of the food and drink you leave out.

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  136. A squirrel with no tail lives near my house, and is able to avoid predators.
    This makes squirrels awesome.

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  137. Squirrels are awesome because my dogs go crazy when they hear a squirrel so much as fart outside.

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  138. Squirrels are good, for killing pc's of all levels the speed of your average squirrel (never mind giant dire versions!) make them unbeatable.

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  139. Three words: Chip and Dale. That's why squirrels are awesome. Unless those guys are chipmunks. Is there a difference? Can I sub out squirrels for chipmunks?

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  141. Happy OSR Christmas

    Squirrels are awesome because they celebrate Festivus - especially the airing of grievances part!

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  142. I always thought it was..

    "Awww... some squirrels over there sure look cute!"

    (Hence the reason that squirrels are awesome.)

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  143. Three words: dire flying squirrels.

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  144. Squirrels are awesome, because they are the main character in Dog TV, which is broadcast in my backyard. They keep my dog entertained while I am away at work!

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  145. Squirrels are awesome because they are like fearless ninjas. Each day they scale the walls of my brick home, scurry across my roof and jump back and forth through the trees. They do this while completely silent. Sure, there are scurrying noises. But I have yet to hear one say anything yet. Squirrels are silently, ninja-ly awesome.

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  146. Squirrels are awesome because the have the power to distract anyone, no matter how good their concen...

    Wait, what was I writing?

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  147. Sign me up!!

    And squirrels are awesome alright - awesomely evil!!! They are trying to take over the world I tell you - with their tiny little grasping hands!!!!

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  148. Would love either of the prizes for Day 7,8, or 12!!! And oh yeah, squirrels are AWESOME cause they taste good!! :D

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  149. Oops.

    Squirrels are cool because they taunt other animals that can kill them.

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  150. squirrels can see the difference between a nut and a seed.

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  151. Why are squirrels awesome? because they aren't chipmunks. Chipmunks are nasty!

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  152. Merry Christmas! The noble squirrel is an awesome creature because this year they did not eat my sunflowers. However, they are on the list for molesting the pumpkins, but still awesome for doing it in such a tidy manner.

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  153. You'd be Nuts not to think Squirrels are awesome, even a Moose can see it! It's the tails..those big, bushy, beautiful tails...awesomesauce!

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  154. Squirrels are awesome for being the daylight equivalent of rats, but getting better PR.

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  155. I also heard squirrels are high in cholesterol.

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  156. Squirrels are awesome because they all look like they are wearing footy pajamas.

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  157. Squirrels are awesome because of gonads and strife. :)

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  158. Squirrels are awesome because of their ability to forage. I was once stopped at a light in Fulton, NY, which at the time had the largest Nestle plant in the western hemisphere, and saw a squirrel run across the street in front of me, from the plant, with a nestle crunch bar- easily identified by it's distinctive wrapper; it paused in the middle of the street and looked at me (or my car I guess), then proceeded to run the rest of the way across the street, into the park and up a tree with it's prize.

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  159. Squirrels are awesome because they have big fluffy tails and eat nuts

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  160. Squirrels are awesome because they can take out a grown man on a motorcycle. No joke. Google "biker vs squirrel" if you want a good laugh.

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  161. This is one of my favorite squirrel revenge stories:

    http://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2016/11/22/503007930/chicago-alderman-warned-about-aggressive-squirrels-then-one-took-him-out

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  162. Squirrels are also known as chubby floofs, therefore awesome.

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  163. I have some fond gaming memories involving squirrels.

    From the Squirrel Scouts in an After the Bomb/Palladium Fastasy Mashup, to the 4e game I ran where the fighter player had a kircpa (intelligent squirrel race) companion that fired arrows from the fighter's shoulder.

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  164. When my oldest daughter was a little girl, I nicknamed her "Squirrel-girl"... That's why Squirrels are awesome!

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  165. I've been so busy with projects I missed this until today. That's okay, because I hate squirrels. My house is surrounded by trees, so I'm very happy when owls move in. The squirrels are less . . . everything . . . when there are owls around.

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